“I’d rather turn this club into a bar room brawl. Get as rowdy as Roethlisberger in a bathroom stall.”

The reference is to a recent incident where Roethlisberger took a 20-year-old student into the bathroom stall of a club while a friend kept watch outside making sure no one got in. The student accused Roethlisberger of sexual assault, but Roethlisberger was never charged.

Listen to Despicable in the embedded video.

Like really ESPN? Can’t you do another story on Tim Tebow or something?

The Roethlisberger story should be covered, but last time I checked an attorney’s job is to deny the charges.

Okay, that’s a little simplistic. If you can’t afford a good attorney, the bad (or overworked, or whatever) attorney’s job is to minimize the punishment. But high-priced attorney’s are paid to deny.

It’s like reporting on the sun rising and setting.

Today the Sun rose in the East. Our reporters were live on scene as light returned to us. We will be tracking the Sun’s movements closely all day and keep you constantly updated on its progress.

Experts from the Petroleum Foundation have noted that the very rising and setting of the sun is proof of how unreliable it is as a source of energy.

I thought I was rambling, but you somehow got 1000 word article out of Roethlisberger’s lawyer saying nothing. Good Job.